RDS: Rewrite connection cleanup, fixing oops on rmmod

This fixes a bug where a connection was unexpectedly
not on *any* list while being destroyed. It also
cleans up some code duplication and regularizes some
function names.

* Grab appropriate lock in conn_free() and explain in comment
* Ensure via locking that a conn is never not on either
  a dev's list or the nodev list
* Add rds_xx_remove_conn() to match rds_xx_add_conn()
* Make rds_xx_add_conn() return void
* Rename remove_{,nodev_}conns() to
  destroy_{,nodev_}conns() and unify their implementation
  in a helper function
* Document lock ordering as nodev conn_lock before
  dev_conn_lock

Reported-by: Yosef Etigin <yosefe@voltaire.com>
Signed-off-by: Andy Grover <andy.grover@oracle.com>
Signed-off-by: David S. Miller <davem@davemloft.net>