bpf: sockmap update/simplify memory accounting scheme

Instead of tracking wmem_queued and sk_mem_charge by incrementing
in the verdict SK_REDIRECT paths and decrementing in the tx work
path use skb_set_owner_w and sock_writeable helpers. This solves
a few issues with the current code. First, in SK_REDIRECT inc on
sk_wmem_queued and sk_mem_charge were being done without the peers
sock lock being held. Under stress this can result in accounting
errors when tx work and/or multiple verdict decisions are working
on the peer psock.

Additionally, this cleans up the code because we can rely on the
default destructor to decrement memory accounting on kfree_skb. Also
this will trigger sk_write_space when space becomes available on
kfree_skb() which wasn't happening before and prevent __sk_free
from being called until all in-flight packets are completed.

Fixes: 174a79ff ("bpf: sockmap with sk redirect support")
Signed-off-by: John Fastabend <john.fastabend@gmail.com>
Acked-by: Daniel Borkmann <daniel@iogearbox.net>
Acked-by: Alexei Starovoitov <ast@kernel.org>
Signed-off-by: David S. Miller <davem@davemloft.net>